Recently I caught up with a good friend of mine from back when I first started in the industry. Let’s call this friend Raven. I met Raven years ago during my time working in a brothel. She was a fun-loving, energetic, bubbly girl who I clicked with immediately. We became fast friends; we carpooled to work, insisted on working all of the same shifts, borrowed each other’s clothes and makeup, and would often go out for cocktails after work. She became my first ever doubles-partner, and as well as being a cherished friend, I also considered her to be somewhat of a “sexual mentor” to me. As she gently coaxed it out of me, my character in the bedroom became slightly naughtier, cheekier, raunchier and more playful. She showed me how to embrace my wild side and ditch my inhibitions. We made quite the dynamic duo. A threesome with Raven and Jasmine was sure to rock your freakin’ world!
But that all feels like a different lifetime ago now. Raven left the industry behind a couple of years ago and she is now a wife, a mother, and a born-again Christian. She has completed her studies, earnt a qualification, and is building an amazing new career for herself (one that involves substantially fewer genitals). As we met for lunch, we chatted casually about her marriage, her kids, and her newfound faith. I asked if she regretted her time as an escort. She told me she didn’t. She said it was a part of her life that had given her confidence, financial independence, and adventures she would never forget. She said that she had “come out” as an ex-escort to her husband, her mum, and her church, and although it was a very difficult conversation, they had all been accepting and forgiving. As a closeted escort myself, I couldn’t help but wonder: had they only been so tolerant because she was coming clean at a time when she had already moved on and left it all behind? Would they have been so supportive if she was still in the industry? Either way, I was comforted to hear that she had found peace with her past life, and that it wasn’t impeding on the healthy and fulfilling relationships in her current one.
But as it always does, curiosity got the better of me, and so I had to ask: did she miss it? I expected her to say what all good wives, mothers, and Christian-women are supposed to say… “Of course not, I only want to have sex with my husband, why would I want to fuck strangers for money?” But to my shock (and tawdry delight), she didn’t deny it. She said that from time to time she toyed with the fantasy of coming back to work. She described how a part of her missed feeling sexy, the thrill of the unknown, and the sexual freedom. It just goes to show, you can take the girl out of escorting... but can you ever really take the escort out of the girl? I was relieved to see that although her life had changed a lot, underneath it all she was still the same fun-loving girl with a cheeky streak and a crude sense of humour. We chatted openly about good sex, bad sex, penises, boob jobs, childbirth, periods, masturbation, squirting, fetishes, porn… I was so glad that I could still talk to her so candidly like this. Personally, I have never been comfortable talking to my non-escort friends this way. It made me wonder, was it the industry that made us so sexually open? Or were we predestined to become escorts because we already had within us this tendency to be sexually open? What came first: the chicken or the cock?
It’s the good old “Nature vs. Nurture” debate. Were we born this way, or are we a product of our circumstances and environment? My friend Jade Rose and I work together every day in our den of sin and debauchery. As you could imagine, this can lead to some pretty fucked up conversations, those which should never fall upon the ears of pure, decent, virtuous ladies. For example, recently one of our discussions involved our early experiences of masturbation. We were tickled to learn that we had both experimented with common objects such as the handle of a hairbrush and a roll-on deodorant bottle… Go figure! Another one of our chats involved me complimenting Jade on how much smoother her pussy was feeling this week after her recent IPL session. Or how about the time she asked me if my tattoos ever felt raised and I said, “only when someone spanks me.” It’s only with my fellow escorts that I feel comfortable expressing myself so honestly and without censorship. No filter necessary!
After one of our particularly X-rated conversations, Jade and I considered whether it was possible that we had some kind of propensity to become escorts all along. Is it something hardwired into some girls? It takes a special kind of girl to be able to reconcile the fact that she sells sex for money. It’s definitely not for everyone. Maybe we have some kind of figurative “escort-gene.” Does escorting stem from a salacious highly-sexualised personality trait? Or is escorting just the catalyst that allows a girl’s sexuality to blossom and flourish? I think it’s probably a combination of both.
But whether I was born this way, or I became this way, I’m just happy that I am this way. And I’m sure as hell going to enjoy it while I can!
Jasmine Lane xx
